Anxiety. It is an ugly shit of a beast that I’ve lived with for over half of my life, and by hell, I hate it with every cell in my body.
I could fill the North Sea twice over with all the tears it’s had me shed.
I could recall to you hundreds of times when it’s pulled life right out from under my feet. and left me sprawled on the ground, paralyzed with devastation.
I could lecture you for days about how shitty and difficult it can make the lives of those around me, and how fucking terrible I feel about that.
But I’m not going to. I’m not going to feed it’s fire.
Instead, I’m going to share with you methods of how I cope and make it through the days without going to pieces.
I Put On Jewellery
I dunno what it it is about putting on jewellery – especially jewellery that I’ve made myself – but when I do, I feel more in control of my life, more confident about my appearance and capable of making it through whatever I need to do without having a mental breakdown. The transformative effect jewellery has on my mood is especially noticeable if it’s earrings that I’m wearing.
I made these ‘No Two Snowflakes Are The Same’ earrings.
Wearing them calms my heartbeat, ranks up my confidence and acts as a reminder that I forever carry winter with me.
Much of my anxiety is about my face and its shape. You can most often find me hiding behind the black forest of my hair. But when I put on my earrings, I feel safe to come out.
I Wear A Scarf
Since forever, scarves have been my security/comfort blankets. It’s a very rare occasion that I’ll leave the house without one. They tend not to be piddly and thin though. I like my scarves so be thick and big and warm enough to know that if I were to get lost in the forest, I’d be able to survive a cold night under it.
If I’m out and about and I feel my soul starting to ache because of people and the fact there’s far too fucking many of them, I wrap my scarf around my face half a dozen times to feel some peace, or hoik it up to make a hood so I can go on my ‘merry’ way.
I Light Candles
Ever since I was old enough to know what a candle was, I’ve been enchanted and comforted by them. Rarely a day goes by when I’m not putting flame to a wick.
Anxiety isn’t picky about where it will or won’t bully me, and an anxiety attack happens almost as often indoors as it does when I’m ‘out there.’ One of the best – and quickest – techniques I have for telling it, albeit silently, to fuck the fuck off, is to light all the candles in the house. Instantly that Hygge feeling (one of coziness…its a whole fascinating concept in Denmark) is conjured up, and anxiety’s hold over me starts to weaken.
I Take A Book Out With Me
When I go out, no matter where, I’m usually equipped with a book or a magazine that I know is going to help ease me into a state where I can calm the fuck down.
While I’m not weight conscious when it comes to which books I’ll take with me, The Ghastling is ideal for those ‘I know I will be collecting tons of shopping shit’ outings.
Say I’m at the dr’s and my appointment is running late, I find that my anxiety increases tenfold if I don’t have a book to read or a notebook to jot in. I hate sitting anywhere with nothing to do. It drives me bat shit crazy, and I’ll to pick apart everything bad that’s ever happened in my life. I always tell people that literature is my life line – and I mean it.
Has any of this been helpful? Want to see more like this? What methods do you use to keep anxiety on the other side of the door?