I had an alright day yesterday. Feels uber weird writing that. But I did.
Well, until about 5pm when my mood went downhill too fast for me to try and snatch it back. I’d wanted to go for an evening walk, catch some autumn textures with my camera and watch some spiders spinning. I’d been thinking about it all day with high spirits, until my mood decided otherwise and I started an internal battle with myself that went something like this:
Me: I’ll go for that walk, It’ll be lovely. I’ll get some gorgeous shots and…
Also Me: Don’t bother. You’ve already lost the best light. You won’t catch anything worthwhile. Plus, you look like absolute shit. Have you SEEN yourself today?
Me: I won’t go then.
Also Me: Good. I mean, you haven’t even washed your face. You’re a fucking state. Better to stay in.
Me: But wait. I’m only going to the nature reserve. Doesn’t matter if I look like shit. And I know I’ll feel better for going. I always feel better after a walk.
Also Me: You’re not going.
Me: I will go.
Also Me: You will not go.
Me: I will.
Also Me: NOT.
Me: Fuck off. I’m going.
I ended up going. After half a dozen times putting on and taking off and putting back on my shoes and camera bag. I was lucky enough to find myself under two flocks of geese. I watched spiders spinning. I caught the early textures of autumn with my camera and wrote a song in my head. For an hour, dear readers, I lived deliciously.