Write It Out

I posted what you’re about to read on social media. I thought it ought to have a home here too.

P.S. In light of my life being upended, my blogging has been neglected, so I’ll be leaving behind the 100 Days Of Blogging series and will come back to posting regularly when I feel ready and able.

Write It Out

If I had to choose between finding and spending the rest of my life with my soulmate or writing, I’d choose writing. And I know I’m not the only one. (For the record, I’m only saying this to reiterate just how imperative writing is to my life. I do have faith I’ll find my person.)

I’ve been floundering these past few weeks in light of complex life changes, and working on my projects with the daily consistency I’m used to hasn’t been possible.

As a result, I’ve been spiraling further down. I should have, despite everything, carved out at least some space to write every day. Writing is the rope that always hauls me out of the abyss. The ridiculous thing is I knew this all along. Ray Bradbury hit the nail when he said, “You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.” I’ve allowed myself to become all too sober.

But when all is chaos, it’s too easy to do everything BUT what you know will help. I self-sabotage. I waste precious time unblocking news sites and reading stories that will further depress me. I look at the social media pages that make me feel invisible in my field of work. I pick at my body and chastise myself for not having a slim enough waist, a pert enough arse, or a wrinkle-free face. I let fatigue have its way with me, and I bury myself under blanket mountains in the middle of the day.

When I’ve managed to carve out space to write, the shift in my mood is profound. I feel rejuvenated. Anne Frank said it best when she wrote that through writing, “…courage is reborn.”

Since I’ve been able to form sentences, writing has been the most valuable salve to my trauma. It was tragically laughable when I reminded myself of this the other day – that all I need to do is write, and I WILL be okay. The most obvious thing in my world was like some massive revelation.

The adage ‘when in doubt, write it out’ has never felt so apt as in this moment. If anyone were to ask me for advice on what to do when in crisis, I’d say – write it out. Make space and write it all out.